Showing posts with label Dark Arts. Show all posts
Showing posts with label Dark Arts. Show all posts

Wednesday, December 21, 2011

From the Sketchbook Archives: Red

I did a whole series of sketchbook images playing with Sharpies...dark portraits from the other side.  Perhaps he is a distant cousin from Hellboy's Rasputin or some denizen from the outer dark.

This is another one with reproduction issues.  I couldn’t get a good shot of this one without a blur.  :-(  I gotta get a friggin' scanner!  ARGH!

Recommended Listening:
Apoptose
Asche
Schattenmaedchen

{Sharpie}

UPDATE:

Another of the Rescans.  Obviously, this one is completely changed and revealed by the Rescan.  With the darkness of this piece and the glare from the sharpies, there really was no way to get a decent shot of this one.  Once again the Scanner saves the day!  Thank You beautiful technology...although technically technology caused the problem in the first place.  Ha.  Enjoy.  Interesting note here is that despite the major blur, the color on this one was fairly accurate in the first piece as well.  With the one exception of the glare turning the blacks red...or maybe just picking up the red beneath...hmph.

Tuesday, December 20, 2011

Up on the Rooftop

"Later that night, he heard the jingling again.  Faintly, just as before, it circled the house like a passing car.  As before, the soft padding crunch of snow and again, the faint jingling.  He stood in the kitchen, a cigarette quivered between his enraged fingers. He smoked two more as the jingling continued for another fifteen minutes. He'd had it with those damned kids.  Ed grabbed the broom and his flashlight and headed out into the snow.

"Alright you little bastards!" Growling, he threw the door open and waived the broom in a wide arc.  The light flashed across the snow.  It was smooth.  No footprints.  He stepped out, broom at the ready.  No footprints anywhere in the yard.  His face full of confusion, his broom lowered.  He heard the jingling again, just beyond the corner of the house.  He raised the broom once more and moved to intercept. They weren't gonna get away.  The snow on his ankles tickled and burned with each step.

At the corner of the house he found no footprints, but could still hear the jingling. Something hit his arm and bounced into the snow.  He leaned over and picked up something wet.  It took him a moment to adjust his hold on the broom and get the flashlight up to his other hand.  It looked like a shredded piece of cloth from a coat, but it was covered in red paint.  No.  No, it wasn't paint.   Ed dropped the cloth and backed away from the house.  His line of vision moved slowly up towards the roof.  His mouth hung agape at the sight of the thing.  It was chewing absently above the bloody patch it made, a ring of bells circling its neck.  Each time it chewed, the bells would softly jingle.

Ed turned and ran.  The flashlight fell free into the soft snow, a small glowing thumbprint disappearing behind him. He hadn't gone that far, the door was just a few more feet away.  He heard a loud snort and his bladder emptied into his pajama pants.  Then there was a hard pinch at his neck, like when his mother used to grab him as a child.  His arms flailed as he was yanked back.   Ed screamed, but then a rough blow at the back of his head made him quiet.  He felt dizzy now.  He lurched and vomited blood as the pinch at his neck grew harder.

"I'll be good Ma.  I won't do it again."  The pinch grew harder still and he knew he was gonna get a spanking.  Then he was flying, flying up and into the christmas sky.  A trail of paint splattered on the snow beneath him. No. No, it wasn't paint."

Recommended Listening:
Svartsinn
Torchbearer, Kill the Light
Elegies for the End

{Image created in Adobe Illustrator and Adobe Photoshop}

Wednesday, December 14, 2011

Gates of the 14 Aethyr

Empty,
I walk through fog and shade and rain.
A door opens within me, before me,
A space within a space.
I step out of nothing into nothing.
I step through and into myself.
I am the gate through which I pass.

All doors swing open,
a vast passage up down to the bottom top
of every no thing.
The sacred hole in the great hedge,
the womb throat of the Universe,
with a great wind singing through it.

Across this vastness,
across this great wallless infinite,
I convey the burden of space.

Recommended Listening:

{created in Photoshop}

Sunday, December 11, 2011

From the Sketchbook Archives: Scream

Looking back, I think this may be an indirect portrait of someone unpleasant I was working with at the time.  Anger and Sharpies - cheaper than therapy I guess.

Recommended Listening:
The Prodigy
Omen
Invaders Must Die

{Sharpie}

 UPDATE:

Wow.  Initially I didn't there was much change between these two, but looking at them side by side I can a severe blur and glare within the original.  The scan turned all the colors up a notch or two as well.  I cannot say it enough - Hooray for scanner!  Hmmmm...my scanner needs a name...I'll get on that.  :-)

Wednesday, December 07, 2011

From the Archives: Skull Tattoo


A Tattoo design that never got used.  Grey added for a little contrast in Photoshop.  Inspired by H.R. Giger, but only mildly.  :-)

{Sharpie, Tone added in Photoshop}

Monday, December 05, 2011

GRUSS VOM KRAMPUS!

Sorry for the delay on this one. We had a power outtage in my neighborhood and I lost several hours of drawing time. Probably Uranus getting ready to go Direct on the 10th.  We also have an Eclipse / Full Moon on the 10th, so expect a bit of Chaos. All this during a Mercury retrograde (Nov. 24th - Dec. 14th). I guess Krampus is in full effect this year!

Regardless, Happy Krampusnacht! I hope you've all been good this year!  I hope that your 2012 is much better!

{Created in the Adobe Creative Suite}

Sunday, December 04, 2011

Krampus is on his way!

I'm not sure why I feel the need to jump on the Krampus bandwagon this year.  I found out about him two years ago and haven't really had the opportunity to work on any pieces involving him until now.  This year has been such a roller coaster through crap I figure it might be nice to believe a little in some cosmic force of justice.

Of course the assumption there is that Krampus won't be coming for me.  If he were coming for me, that might not be all bad though.  Cover your ears kids!  A hairy horny devil with a ridiculously long tongue kidnaps me and drags me away to do with me as he pleases.  All because I've been bad.  Hmmm...I say let the punishment fit the crime, eh!

I guess in the end, I just like the idea of Krampus.  He's a little taste of punishment to help us appreciate the good in life.  I wonder perhaps if he is some seed idea left over from Saturnalia?  Perhaps he is the last Lord of Misrule from the lost tradition of the Feast of Fools.  Perhaps not completely lost, Halloween / Samhain has taken on many of the qualities of Saturnalia and the Feast of Fools. Considering how much our calendars have changed since those times, Halloween may be closer to the correct timeframe.

I am intrigued that these kinds of festivals seems to emerge from the human psyche regardless of repression or taboo or dogma or fiat.  Close one door and the urge will find its way out through a window.  This is the cord that Krampus strikes with me. Aha! there's the reason: The repressed urge given its day in the sun.

I think we need more of that...at least here in the United States we certainly do.  Too many natural urges are repressed and criminalized.  We need to find healthy outlets instead of shoving it all in a box...or a prison.  I feel Krampus is part of that.  A little comedic S & M for the whole family!  Be good kids for goodness sake!  Only one more day until Krampusnacht!

{Image created in Adobe Illustrator}

Saturday, December 03, 2011

Only two more days...

Another fun filled Krampus portrait to celebrate the imminent arrival of that precious Christmas Devil!  Be good for goodness sake kids, Krampus is coming!

{Images created in Adobe Illustrator and Adobe Photoshop}

UPDATE 091014:  This piece is now available on a tshirt design or other cool paraphernalia at my Neatoshop!  Drop by and check it out!

Friday, December 02, 2011

Krampus is Coming!

Here is a Krampus Card to celebrate the season!  If you would like to steal and print this, feel free.  All you naughty children better be good for goodness sake!  Krampus is Coming!  Only three more days!

{Image created using the Adobe Creative Suite}

Thursday, December 01, 2011

Not Exactly Krampus...

Not exactly Krampus, but I think devilish enough to fit the season.  Be good for goodness sake, Krampus is coming!

{Digital images manipulated in Photoshop}

UPDATE 010413:

I discovered recently that this piece had some visual issues that I hadn't noticed before.  I've gone through several computer upgrades since this was originally created so I'm chalking it up to the better system I'm using.  Regardless, I noticed the hard black edge within the piece that I had not seen before.  Here is an updated version of how I intended the piece to look.  It's a subtle trade, but I had not intended that hard line in the original.


Wednesday, November 30, 2011

From the Sketchbook Archives: In the Darkness

This is me pushing Sharpies again.  Sadly in the middle of this piece my Teal Sharpie ran out. I had to mix it with yellow and light green.

This one had to be tweaked a bit to get it to show correctly.  I don’t have access to a scanner right now, but I do have a digital camera.  I discovered that the flash reflects quite nicely off of heavy sharpie works.  UGH.  This piece and several others had to be worked over in Photoshop to get them even close to the originals.  When I have access to a scanner again, I will properly re-scan these.

{Sharpie}

UPDATE:  Fresh scan from my new scanner as of 01.28.12.  No glare in the fresh one and no needful Photoshop retouch.  The actual color of the physical piece is somewhere between these two.

Wednesday, November 23, 2011

From the Sketchbook Archives: Dancing Hand

I’ve always been disturbed by hands with more than five fingers or hands in a configuration other than human. I think at the base it may be the same kind of reaction I have to bugs that I consider to have “too many legs”. It makes my skin crawl for some reason.

I used to be afraid of Spiders, but we made a truce. I don’t kill them and they stay off me. I let them have the unused corners of rooms so they can eat annoying things like flies and gnats and buzzy little annoying bugs. We get along. However Millipedes, Silverfish, and Centipedes...not so much. Yuck.

Sorry for the crappy reproduction here. This is another from the sketchbooks.  Graphite also reflects the flash of a camera quite dramatically.

{Graphite}

UPDATE:  Fresh scan from my new scanner as of 01.29.12.  No blur here and I am amazed at the amount of line detail that the scanner picked up.  Yay Scanner!

Sunday, November 20, 2011

Suicide Set Part V: If Flesh Could Crawl


I’m including this piece in the suicide set even though technically it was not in the same format as the other pieces or even part of the set.  It was done just before the others...maybe two or three weeks.  I feel the need to include it because this type of thing doesn’t occur in a vacuum.  It was directly inspired by the song As Far From God from the first Garbage album.

I would like to note on the side of safety and communication that today, despite the difficulty of my current set of life circumstances, that I do not in any way feel suicidal.  It is simply that the time has come to share these pieces.

{Sharpie}

UPDATE 010413:

This piece was Exhumed and reinvestigated with color in November 2013.  Check out the Exhumed image here.

Saturday, November 19, 2011

Suicide Set Part IV: Hopelessness


After the violent parade of negative emotions had passed, after they had drained me of any motivation, thought, or energy, only hopelessness was left.  I was empty and lost.  There was no way out and no way onward.  There was no way.  It was in this darkness I attempted to take my own life.

I realize many things about my actions at that time now.  Things that I can only understand in hindsight.  At the time I was under the sway of powerful negative emotional patterns and I consider myself very lucky to have come through the experience alive.  My own feelings brought me to the edge of death.

The person I am today is nothing like the person who attempted to take his life. I can see now that I needed to come to this edge and look out at the ultimate destruction I was heading toward.  I needed to hold my life in my hands and understand that the choice of its continuance or destruction was mine and mine alone.  I needed this moment to know that I had some form of control, that my life was indeed my own.  This instant, this moment of choice, has informed all the decisions I have made in my life since that day.

I would like to note on the side of safety and communication that today, despite the difficulty of my current set of life circumstances, that I do not in any way feel suicidal.  It is simply that the time has come to share these pieces.

{Sharpie}

Friday, November 18, 2011

Suicide Set Part III: Blame


Sister of guilt and father of shame, blame is the negative spotlight eye of God.  There is nowhere to hide.  Blame makes it impossible to move for fear of suffering and sorrow. Blame is the fire of torture now turned to self immolation.  The hand that burns me now is my own.  Blame is the self fulfilling prophecy of "it is all my fault." All of it. If it wasn't my fault before, after blame is finished, it will be.

I would like to note on the side of safety and communication that today, despite the difficulty of my current set of life circumstances, that I do not in any way feel suicidal.  It is simply that the time has come to share these pieces.

{Sharpie}

Thursday, November 17, 2011

Suicide Set Part II: Worry


I realized as I began this post that this week is the thirteenth anniversary of my suicide attempt.  A strange and macabre anniversary to be sure, but perhaps one of the most significant moments in my life history.  The person I am today is vastly different from the person who tried to take his life.  I still consider things deeply and intensely, but I do not worry as I once did.

Worry is about the weight of my thoughts at that time. Everything felt too heavy to move.  I felt buried or lost in a labyrinth of caves. Every feeling was a complicated net of issues that seemed impossible to unravel. I couldn't find a way out. Every new facet I discovered seemed only to lead me into greater complication and darkness. All my hope was overwhelmed by the burden of my feelings.

I would like to note on the side of safety and communication that today, despite the difficulty of my current set of life circumstances, that I do not in any way feel suicidal.  It is simply that the time has come to share these pieces.

{Sharpie}

Wednesday, November 16, 2011

Suicide Set Part I: Panic


In Mid-November of 1998 I attempted suicide by swallowing a bottle of muscle relaxers.  My life at the time felt completely out of my control and I felt myself sliding into darkness, but I felt powerless to stop it. I created the drawings in the suicide set just before my attempt.  I don’t remember drawing these pieces.  Looking at them now I realize that they are based on the four elements, but at the time I don’t recall intentionally directing them that way.  I was drawing more out of emotional desperation than any kind of intent.

Panic addresses my inability to communicate.  No matter how hard I tried, it seemed that my ability to verbalize my needs was stifled and choked.  The air was running out and I think I knew on some deep level that I was running out of time.  That the opportunity to fight back was quickly evaporating.  I was sliding into the final darkness and felt I had no way to stop the descent.  I felt completely powerless.

I really only understand any of this after analyzing in the years following.  During the event I felt removed from myself.  The month preceding my attempt, I felt like I was on auto pilot.  A ghost robot of myself set for self destruct.

I would like to note on the side of safety and communication that today, despite the difficulty of my current set of life circumstances, that I do not in any way feel suicidal.  It is simply that the time has come to share these pieces.

{Sharpie}

Some catching up to do...

Sorry for disappearing for a few weeks there.  I was finishing up my move and cleaning my old abode...aaaannnnd to top things off, because I didn't have nearly enough to do, I caught the flu this week.  OH JOY!   However, today my move is complete, my old abode is clean and fresh, and my flu is on the mend (although my ribs are very sore from coughing - ouchie).  Here's a little devil I concocted in penance.  Hope you like.

{Digital images manipulated in Photoshop}

Tuesday, November 15, 2011

From the Sketchbook Archives: Winged Cat Demon


Another from the sketchbooks.  Quick sketch of a cat demon thingie.  I figured they would still chase twitchy little rodents even if they had bat wings.  As you can see, I never decided on the tail.  Also, I think this might be a dark aspect of my personality when I get too dehydrated.

{Sharpie}


UPDATE:

Another update from the Rescans.  On this one, the scan was so much better than the photo I took, I didn't have to touch up the image at all.  On the first image, I had to adjust the brightness, contrast, and sharpness. Here you can see the molten deliciousness of the Sharpie where I filled in the blacks.  It looks almost exactly like the original image.  ...mmmmm Sharpie.  :-)
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